Are you one of those individuals who struggles with saying “No” to the increasing requests, daily interruptions, and demands people are making?  This applies to both your professional and personal life.

I’ve had many clients recently share with me that this is a struggle for them.  They are such high-performers, and suffer from the famous “Pleasing Syndrome” that they find themselves with increasing responsibilities, projects, and workloads because they have a difficult time saying “No” and they want to help and please others.  They quickly become the “go-to person” in the office.  Not only that, but their weekends are also filled with family and other personal commitments because they have difficulty turning anyone down.  The result is they have no time left to unwind and simply rejuvenate from their busy week.

In this day and age, the reality is - time is precious, and the solution is – we have to get more selfish with how we use our time.  I suggest that it’s not really about saying “No”, it’s really about “How” you say it.  If someone walks into your office and interrupts you, you can simply say, “I’m completing an important deadline, can we talk later today?” and then, book a meeting in your calendar with them. Or if you’re asked to take on more projects, you might say, “I’d love to be able to focus on this, however, I have a number of other projects to complete and realistically would not be able to get to this for another couple of weeks.  What’s your timeline on this?  Can it wait, or should we look at a different avenue?”

What I’m saying is that someone else’s emergency, doesn’t always have to become yours.  You have to make a quick judgment call on how you can set those expectations and manage accordingly.  The same goes with personal commitments.  If scheduling an event stresses you out because it takes away from the personal time you were looking forward to on the weekend, then give yourself the permission to turn the invitation down by saying “I’m sorry, but that weekend doesn’t work for us.  Can we look at a different date?” 

The fact is, people will still respect you, still think highly of you, and will continue to like you!  You’re just a busy person, that’s all!

When I’m speaking with my clients these days, everyone seems to feel the same way!  The summer just started, yet it feels like it’s almost over.  The weeks and the weekends come and go! Time is just slipping away.  We all wish we could control it and cherish it for as long as we could!   So here is what I think - it’s the perfect time to break some old habits of working too many hours and not having the time to enjoy the simple things in life that bring you joy! 

For myself, summer is about spending time with my family and friends, swimming, bike-riding and enjoying walks around our neighborhood, maybe even a backyard bonfire in the evening.  I really try to make a point of leveraging some down time to do something that I enjoy.  Summer is the perfect opportunity to reduce your work hours and plan some down time to fit a personal daily activity. 

So why not make the commitment to yourself of finishing your work day earlier than your usual time.  Once you get home, choose to do something for yourself, for your enjoyment, and maybe even get some exercise outside!  The important thing is that you choose to do something for you.  Take the time to cherish and experience the summer as opposed to letting it pass you by.  The goal is to look back on this summer and say, “What an amazing summer this was and what a great time I had!”